IntroductionNarcissism is a personality disorder characterized by a grandiose sense of self-importance, a need for excessive admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. Narcissists often have difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships, as they tend to be demanding, controlling, and manipulative.
One of the biggest challenges of being in a relationship with a narcissist is that they are often unable to see things from your perspective. They may be quick to blame you for their problems and refuse to take responsibility for their own actions. This can make it difficult to communicate effectively and resolve conflict.
Each tool has a lesson behind it; an ideal of what a story needs. The germ and philosophy and desire behind the tool’s creation. Each tool has a point of view on story writing, a new way to look at the words and sentences. Some tools address whole scenes. Some work down at the syllable level. All of them are different than the way I’m doing it naturally.
What Is an Objective Correlative?
An Objective Correlative is a tool, but not a true literary device. A tool used to link two or more elements in a narrative or poem (three or more elements is typical). It has been used in film as well to great effect. It creates a connection between an object and seemingly disparate elements, such as characters, events, emotions, or themes. The objective coordinative allows the writer to connect these different elements of the story world, creating a cohesive narrative that provides insight into the characters, themes, and events. Its 'objective' however is emotional connection and reader experience. And they can pack a punch.
A Reminder before we begin:
I'm a fiction writer. Why I post these is for other writers, and to keep them in a place I can find them easy — because I use these all the time to help develop character personality types and Passive/Aggressive is useful in many ways for secondary characters. I've yet to use it for MCs. It would be an excellent addition for character arch. The trait is easy to recognize as well, adding to the immersion experience for the reader. They come in all shapes and sizes. Some a brilliant but don't believe it. Some are back-stabbing little dweebs who are just trying to get a little closer to your back.
So, have fun and let's get started.
2. AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION
AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals express their feelings and opinions and advocate for their needs in a way that violates the rights of others. Thus, aggressive communicators are verbally and/or physically abusive.
- try to dominate others
- use humiliation to control others
- criticize, blame, or attack others
- be very impulsive
- have low frustration tolerance
- speak in a loud, demanding, and overbearing voice
- act threateningly and rudely
- not listen well
- interrupt frequently
- use “you” statements
- have an overbearing or intimidating posture
- become alienated from others
- alienate others
- generate fear and hatred in others
- always blame others instead of owning their issues, and thus are unable to mature
3. PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATIONPASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals appear passive on the surface but are really acting out anger in a subtle, indirect, or behind-the-scenes way. People who develop a pattern of passive-aggressive communication usually feel powerless, stuck, and resentful – in other words, they feel incapable of dealing directly with the object of their resentments. Instead, they express their anger by subtly undermining the object (real or imagined) of their resentments.
Passive-Aggressive communicators will often:
4. ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION
ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals clearly state their opinions and feelings, and firmly advocate for their rights and needs without violating the rights of others. These individuals value themselves, their time, and their emotional, spiritual, and physical needs and are strong advocates for themselves while being very respectful of the rights of others.
- state needs and wants clearly, appropriately, and respectfully
- express feelings clearly, appropriately, and respectfully
- use “I” statements
- communicate respect for others
- listen well without interrupting
- feel in control of self
- have good eye contact
- speak in a calm and clear tone of voice
- have a relaxed body posture
- feel connected to others
- feel competent and in control
- not allow others to abuse or manipulate them
- stand up for their rights
- feel connected to others
- feel in control of their lives
- are able to mature because they address issues and problems as they arise
- create a respectful environment for others to grow and mature
- “We are equally entitled to express ourselves respectfully to one another.”
- “I am confident about who I am.”
- “I realize I have choices in my life and I consider my options.”
- “I speak clearly, honestly, and to the point.”
- “I can’t control others but I can control myself.”
- “I place a high priority on having my rights respected.”
- “I am responsible for getting my needs met in a respectful manner.”
- “I respect the rights of others.”
- “Nobody owes me anything unless they’ve agreed to give it to me.”
- “I’m 100% responsible for my own happiness.”
It occurs to me that our age can be deduced by our phrasal verbs. When we are young, it is all up; we run up, grow up, rush up, want to stay up. When we are older it is all down; slow down, hold it down, calm down, I need to lay down.
|Author: Glenn Hefley
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